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Outspoken Confidence

I wouldn’t call myself a feminist, but what I will get into here is definitely a “feminist moment” to stand up for women and how they decide to use words, their mouth and certainly their freedom of expression. In many cultures all these rights are taken away from a woman. They also make her less of value if she were to use them. If a woman has outspoken confidence (again, in many but not all cultures), she is viewed as too “manly, disrespectful and shameless,” which in turn becomes very unattractive to a man in this culture.

Women are literally skin, bones and hormones. But mostly hormones. Our hormones trigger our emotions. Love, anger, sadness and so on. So why is that freedom taken from us? Why is it when a woman is angry, she can not express her anger? Why do men only have that right? But when she uses her tears, from all her pain, she is suddenly a great woman? We have to be in pain so people would respect us? Because if we ever talk back or speak loudly then, we have no shame? It’s one thing to be disrespectful or rude, but it’s another to stand up for yourself and have dignity. A woman should always have outspoken confidence. That is what my father has taught me and those are the same principles I will pass onto my daughters. Many parents are not instilling this into their children causing their daughters to feel obligated to tape their mouths shut and save it and sons enforcing their wife, sister etc. to not have any confidence. As a human we all have the right to speak, express our emotions and thoughts, be angry, be sad, be over joyful, no matter what, as long as we don’t hurt anyone in our way.

My message for ladies who are in this situation: be yourself and love yourself. There is no better advice. Always accept yourself for who you are and don’t let anyone control you or your self confidence. Love and respect everything and everyone around you, but mostly yourself. Self love is contagious. Some will love you even more but unfortunately others will dislike you even more but let them be. Love harder, cry harder, say what you need to say. Stand up for your rights and if anyone wants to shame you, wear your pride louder with a big smile on your face.

My message for new parents: teach them young and teach them right. Teach your sons to be gentle and approving of a woman’s thoughts and or feelings and that they should never be disregarded, and should be respected so in turn she is respectful of your disappointments and anger. Teach your daughters that their feelings and opinions always matter, their voice matters and to never accept anything less.

We have the power to change this. If we all are acceptable of who we are and have the “take it or leave it” attitude, that’s when it becomes a norm.

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